Jordan and I met at the ripe old ages of 16 and 17. Our hearts were knit together early on, and we celebrate 10 years of marriage this year, along with the extra 5 we dated.
The two of us grew up together. We’ve experienced gut-wrenching pain, loss and difficulty, and have also shared our greatest moments of joy and celebrated one another’s success. We’ve learned to open our hearts fully to one another and share every last detail, good or bad, and we’ve found an intimacy, a being fully known, that we feel is rare and worth sharing.
I often look back on my life and wonder how in the world I ended up with a man who is exactly what I want now, not what I was looking for at 16 (even though that puka shell necklace and those flowy highlighted locks were quite dreamy). A man who draws from the depths of me, asks the right questions, prays for me and gives me the space I need to discover God and myself; a man who intentionally loves each of our kids in the specific ways that they experience love; a man who tends to the needs of people around him without requiring anything in return, always a giver and never a taker; the man who I love with every part of me and didn’t know I needed.
My daily choice is to give and hide nothing. A heart that’s naked and unafraid with this one.
We wanted to share some of our poetry around this topic with you. And we’ve also attached a podcast from a series we shared after some experiences that brought us into this space of open vulnerability with one another. We hope you’ll give it a full listen and be encouraged to find this place in your own marriages and relationships.
Dim light shines on melodies
Hummed from heart to heart,
Exposes unexplored crevices
And blankets empty matter.
Blank pages, endless encounters;
Where limits are no longer,
One brush stroke tells the story
Of a thousand words, sacred meanings.
We find new unknowns
In the familiar knowing.
And happen upon a space,
A land only we’ve discovered.
The uncommon holy
Meets wild abandon;
Safety outside the lines,
Full disclosure of identity;
Flesh and blood, shadow self
Shamelessly merged into one,
A raw offering of love.
In this place,
Naked and Unafraid,
I cannot give
I won’t accept
To do so would
deny us both
this place of full
Sex to be one;
Oneness is the home we return to
that we weren’t even from.
The opening of Desire is the
vulnerable act of erotic meekness.
I could plunder what is given and
take what I want,
But to give more than physical,
More than sensual.
To give of my spiritual nakedness,
This is trust incomparable.
Shaming’s what we do explicit and implicit.
Eyes and no eyes betray,
But we stand proudly unprotected
before the need for clothing of this
Quickly the divinely woven leaves of
fear can materialize,
But I will tear them off every time
snake calls to its rival.
It’s dead and it’s done and hiding
never helped in the first place.
Naked and Unafraid PODCAST:
Photo of baby Jordan and Andrea
Featured photo by Payge Stevens Photography